It’s so damn quiet but I have a flicker of WiFi connection…
Oh no, I’m consumed by anxiety and fear and yet apparently I wanted this. We’ve landed the enormous unwieldy ship of our lives, box after box full of who knows what. And it feels as though we have come aground on a rocky crag. Perched up a dark track on the edge of a hill with nature everywhere. I love nature but now wonder if I love pavements and humans more? Laurie has hated every step and spends each night saying with eyes brimming with extra large tears ‘I just want to go home - no really Mummy plleeeeaaase can we go home.’ Back to Oxford he means. Where he is known, understood. Where there is a flow of life and the river to wash away your tears. Oh my god. What to do? My spirit seems to have been sapped by the waiting, negotiating, persuading. Now the boxes litter my path and I have no desire to find out what lurks inside. In fact today I realise I feel lonely, the most uncomfortable of emotions. But I can’t, I have a ship to steer and its full of precious cargo. I have...